Dinner with strangers in NYC: what it’s like and how to try it
Updated
Sitting down to dinner with people you have never met sounds either delightful or terrifying, depending on who you ask. In New York it has become a popular way to meet new people: there are apps that book you a seat, supper clubs in restaurants and apartments, and communal tables all over the city. Here is what to expect and how to make the most of it.
The main formats
- App-arranged dinners: you answer a few questions and are matched with a small group at a restaurant. Timeleft is the best-known example and usually runs its dinners on a set evening of the week.
- Supper clubs: a host or a small team runs a dinner, sometimes in a restaurant, sometimes at home, for a mix of guests. Many are listed on event platforms such as Eventbrite, Luma and Tock.
- Communal tables and cooking classes: less structured, but you end up next to someone new and with something to talk about.
Prices and formats change often, so check the details of any event before you book.
What it is actually like
Most dinners start a little stiffly and loosen up by the main course. Hosts often help with conversation prompts or seating. You will probably click with one or two people at the table and simply enjoy the others’ company, which is a good result.
You usually pay for your own food and drinks, on top of any ticket. Ask about the price range before you go if that matters to you.
How to enjoy it
- Arrive on time; the first ten minutes set the tone.
- Ask open questions and listen to the answers. Curiosity is the easiest way into a conversation.
- Talk to both sides of you, not just the most outgoing person at the table.
- Leave when you are ready. Nobody expects you to stay until closing.
The hard part is the second meeting
A great dinner with strangers is still one evening. If you liked someone, ask for a way to stay in touch before you leave and suggest something specific within a week. Our guide on how to ask someone to hang out has a few easy ways to do it.
If a big table is not for you
A lively table of six is great for some people and exhausting for others. If you would rather sit across from one person, Simurgsu introduces people in Manhattan and nearby Brooklyn who chose the same kind of evening, with a five-minute call first so you are not meeting a stranger cold. Whichever you choose, the usual habits apply: a public place, your own way home, and a friend who knows where you are.
